Three down, thirteen to go.

Not much to say.  Really restless today.  Things ok overall.  Only one more of this round to go.  THAT'S good!

Almost a week has flown by

No excuse for not posting this week.  Not much going on except for snow.  Don't get me wrong, I love snow....but even I have had enough for this year.  Chloe does too.....she's having trouble with the snow "mountains" in our neighborhood.  Hard to do your thing if you get my drift.  Ha!

I am looking forward to Monday and treatment #3.  Strange to say I am excited huh but it means only one more left of this round after Monday.  The next three month weekly round isn't supposed to make you feel yucky (more fatigue than anything) so I look forward to that.  Not looking forward to weekly treatments however.

One good thing is that they were able to get blood on Friday out of my port for the first time without a big production.  I had a different nurse who had me start taking very deep breaths while she was getting set up....in through my nose, out through my mouth as deeply as I could.  I kept doing it the whole time and it worked.

Besides being tired, the only issue I continue to have is being able to sleep.  I can't seem to turn off my brain long enough to get to sleep and I wake up regularly throughout the night.  Dr. Beekman is working with me to figure something out but so far nothing seems to be working.  Right now it's not a huge issue because I feel pretty good but when treatments go to weekly and the major side effect is fatigue, it's going to get harder.  Oh well, at least I'm not throwing up.

Trying to get motivated to go to the gym.  No excuse but I just want to stay snuggled with Chloe and not  move.  THAT'S not going to help me lose weight though.  Bye!

note to self....

......remember that next time on days 4 and 5 I will feel like crap, be emotional, cry at any stupid little thing, feel like I've been run over by a truck and desperate to get my life back.

....but on day 6 I will feel much better.

Message from a student.............kids are incredible!

I received this message last night from a parent (Melissa Buie) who has a daughter at Symons and she is in my after school program.  I talked with the kids in the group about my hair loss and shared how I felt.  This is the conversation between Melissa and her daughter............incredible!!!

"Amanda talked to me tonight about you losing your hair.  She was sad about it and asked if you'd be ok and if it hurt you to lose it.  I told her you were going to be just fine because there are so many people who love you and say prayers for you.  I told her it made you sad but it didn't hurt you physically.  She thought about it a minute then asked if she could grow her hair out again and donate it to Locks of Love to make you a wig.  She donated her hair about a year ago and was so proud to be helping someone else with her donation.  I told her she could absolutely grow her hair out and donate it again and in the meantime, she could keep saying prayers that you will be ok.  She told me she would and even if you talk quietly, God can hear your whispers.  So, when you're feeling sad, just remember there is a little girl out there waiting to give you her hair and whispering her prayers that you will be just fine.  Have a peaceful night Nancy.  Love, Melissa and Amanda."

Life doesn't get much better that this!

A Valentine's Day I Will NEVER Forget!

The day started out sad with the realization that the hair was falling out.  Chemo was next.  But my day ended perfectly and even though there may be hundreds of things I'd rather be doing on Valentine's Day, it was the most memorable one of my life.  Here are some pictures of what happened.   Thanks to Lisa and Connie for their great pictures.

The first picture is of my hairdresser Janelle Kimberly who works at Brown and Deline on the west side of Ann Arbor. I told her that I wanted to post her picture as a way of getting more clients....see the good work she does???  Actually, she is wonderful and I don't know too many hairdressers who do house calls.  Pretty special lady and I highly recommend her!





The second picture is of the cake that Karen baked (heart shaped of course) and brought complete with ice cream........it HAD to be a party right?








Lynn couldn't be here in person so we set her up on Skype and she joined us complete with scull cap, large flower in her hair, and glass of    
wine.....which seemed to refill automatically.  Her wit, smart ass comments and support kept us all laughing!





Let the shaving begin....  I always was intrigued with the mohawk hair cuts sported by boys at school so I asked Janelle if she'd give me one.

Still don't see what boys see in this.  Not sure I like this look!







Here she goes.  This picture shows the realization that it was really going to happen.  I am soooooooo glad that Connie, Lisa, Julie, and Karen (and Lynn) were there along with Janelle and I or I think it would have been sad.

The only one who had a problem with the hair cut was Chloe.  She wouldn't come near me.  I finally got down on the floor and got close to her and talked to her.  After a minute, she came close to my head, sniffed it a bit and then licked my head.  She is better today but still loos at me funny!



Here's the gang!  No one volunteered to shave their hair along with me so I had to settle for them wearing goofy hats instead.

Julie even drew a pink heart on my head (wouldn't THAT be a fun activity for kids???)

MY ABSOLUTELY FAVORITE PICTURE OF MY SISTER CONNIE AND ME!!!!!

I arrived at school this morning and was greeted by nine staff members who were wearing wigs.  I'm happy to report that I believe that MY wig looks the best!!!

I am the luckiest woman alive!!!

Two Down, Fourteen To Go!!!

Treatment #2 went well.  Hard to concentrate but things went well.  Had to draw blood for the Genetic Testing and once again, they had trouble getting it to come out.  Connie enjoyed watching me raise my right arm, look to the left, and cough non-stop.......isn't your chemo buddy supposed to be NICE????

Day started really rough.  Was at the gym and ran my hand through my hair and came away with a bunch of hair.  Took a shower and lots more fell out....sooooooo thin and I started crying.  I knew it was coming but still was not ready for it.  I decided that I want to control it (go figure) so I am having it shaved off tonight.  I think that clumps falling out and bald spots would be even harder to take so it's going all at once.  Having a few friends over to document the "event" and will post once I get used to it.  Going to wear a wig to school tomorrow.  We'll see.  Little nervous.

What a GREAT Day!

Over the past month we've established that I am a very fortunate person with lots of caring friends and family members.  These wonderful women above are part of that group.  We all graduated from High School together in 1972 (yes, I know that's before some of you were born......shut up!) and we have kept in touch since then.  We actually get together at Christmas every year and for the past 15 or so years (can't remember exactly) have gone on a summer trip together.  Pretty remarkable group and I treasure their friendship.  We met for lunch today and they all sported the pin to the right....VERY special.  I also got a new cool looking hat and even some "bangs" to attach to a hat.....that's going to be fun!  I always love spending time together but today was very special time and yet another wonderful memory of the girls.

On another note.......still have my hair.  Hmmmm!  Had an interesting blood draw through my port yesterday.  They couldn't get any blood out of it.  Not sure what was going on.  They finally tipped me back in the chair, put my feet up, had me turn my head to the left, and cough for a while.  I think they were messing with me!!!  Got blood out though.  Interesting.

Day 14....still have my hair.....hmmmm!

My brother Bob says my blog is boring so I told him about where I AM losing hair and now he won't talk to me.  Enough said.  He asked for it!!!

Tomorrow (Friday) is a blood draw (the first time in my port which makes me nervous) and then Monday is treatment #2.  It seems like such a LONG time since the first one.  I think it's because I have felt so good.

Waiting sucks.

Teachers DO make a difference!

I am not talking about just me and I always knew this but since being diagnosed I have heard from so many former students wishing me well and telling me the strangest things they remember about being in my classroom.

I am so proud to be able to communicate with them, love to hear about what they are doing and how they have become incredible adults, and that they care enough to keep in touch with former teachers.

So all you teachers out there (and parents who "teach" all the time)....even on days when the little darlings drive you crazy....know that you ARE making a difference in their lives and you never know exactly what will get through to them and what they will remember so just don't quit trying!!!

crabby and pissy and bitchy....oh my

What is WRONG with me?  I hollered at my hair in the shower this morning....seriously.  I told it that if it was going to fall out to just do it and get it done.

I realized that I still have another week to go before treatment (they've now moved to Monday....Valentine's Day, whoopee).  I don't want to do this anymore.  I know I have no options but I WANT TO BE DONE!!!!

Ok, enough of the pity party.

On a humorous note.....I wonder if when I lose all of my hair I will lose all of the little nose hairs too????  That's a good thing right?

What Cancer CANNOT Do

I wish I could take credit for writing this but I received this message in a card  and loved it....thanks Hayley!

Cancer is so limited.....

It cannot cripple LOVE.
It cannot shatter HOPE.
It cannot corrode FAITH.
It cannot destroy PEACE.
It cannot kill FRIENDSHIP.
It cannot suppress MEMORIES.
It cannot silence COURAGE.
It cannot invade the SOUL.
It cannot steal ETERNAL LIFE.
It cannot conquer the SPIRIT.


The messages written in cards and the messages written by friends are so powerful.  I've learned that I need to do a far better job of sending cards in the future.  They are so special!

LOVE the snow!

Isn't living in Michigan wonderful?  I really love sitting here looking outside while snuggling with Chloe and knitting a scarf.  Life is good.

Well I guess by now it's safe to say I made it through the first round of chemo with very little problem.  Hope I'm not tempting fate but I am so glad.  Little tired but no throwing up.......HOORAY!!!!!!

I think something is going on with my head....scalp feels strange and hair is limp.  Guess that's the look of things to come.  Oh well.  I will deal with it.

Stay warm today!  Enjoy the snow!!!